AN ASTROLOGER’S TALE — WAKING MY SLEEPING T-SQUARE

March 26, 2014Leave a reply

“Astrology for the Astrologically Challenged,” by Deborah Smith Parker

I’m an Aries and today is my birthday! So I’m going to write about ME – specifically a five week period in high school when I first consciously claimed my T-square by learning I could leave the well-traveled path in spite of pressure to stay safely in the middle. My Neptune in the 12th house opposes my Sun in the sixth and both square my Mars in Gemini in the ninth house–a highly creative aspect and a good comrade in wars, I discovered when new tactics are required.

I had to go to war in high school because my writing process was under Cannonattack. But it was a war in which direct attacks were ineffective and I had no identified path to victory. Thank God for Neptune which led me to more devious guerrilla tactics from which I emerged victorious, and the person I defeated never knew the difference. Here’s what happened.

I’ve always been direct. My parents say I came out that way. Well, what else is an Aries child to do?  The world doesn’t deal well with those of us who talk back to it, calling us outlaws. But I’m not an outlaw. I generally operate within the law, and if I’m not within it I’m at least about it.

My junior year in high school I had an experience in English class, which I loved, that would forever alter my perception of the law and, consequently, the outlaw. I got A’s on all the themes I’d written until midway through the semester. At that point, we were told we must first outline impromptu themes we wrote weekly in class. It would enhance the creative process, we were told.

At 16 I didn’t know much but I knew I was headed for conflict. Outline term papers, yes. Short creative themes, no. I also knew that once the tap opened from my personal subconscious stream, it had to tumble unobstructed from my brain out through my fingers to the paper —  an exhilarating ride, like running a stretch of rapids in a canoe.

But I tried. I made my first note and then my mind went blank. Nothing followed. This had never happened before. I made a quick decision—to hell with the outline. I wrote my theme as usual and handed it in, sans outline.  Two days later my theme was returned, graded B. “Lacks organization,” she wrote. “An outline would help.”

I argued with her. “How could discoveries be made without freedom to explore?  What about Columbus?”

“He had maps and charts,” she said.

“Not for where no one been yet,” I countered. “He had an idea.”

Canoeing rapidsI tried the rapids analogy on her. She’d never been in a canoe.  I was again instructed to use the outline. Twice more I handed in themes without it. Again the pedestrian B, followed by an insulting C accompanied by more nagging comments on how helpful an outline would be.

The following week I wrote my theme as usual. I finished a few minutes before the end of class, then hastily scratched out an outline of what I’d done and handed both in, not the least bit guilty about my deception.

“Wonderful work!” beamed out at me from under a big A. “See how an outline helps?” she wrote on my returned theme.

Indeed. I did see. I saw much. I saw I was in a war I had never known existed, a war in which we are all unwitting soldiers. We are either defending something or attacking it. Those who are defenders are “in charge.” Those who want change are outlaws, heretics, anarchists. In that instant I also understood, in some broad sense, some of the rules of engagement–and I had chosen sides. For the rest of my life I was to be, with few exceptions, an outlaw either storming or outwitting the well defended citadels of status quo.

It felt good. It still feels good more than 50 years later.

Deborah Smith Parker is the author of “Humanus Astrologicus” and “The Horse That Haunts My Heart,” available both in soft cover on this site and on Kindle. To sign up to receive her blog or follow her on Twitter (@astro_logicus) and Facebook click to the right of this post.

About author:

Deborah Smith Parker is re-writing the often impenetrable language of astrology into a much friendlier form. She has spent her 30 plus years as an astrological consultant, writer, teacher and lecturer freeing the rich astrological images and their descriptions increasingly buried under modern clinical and technological descriptions. Her additional work in public policy has provided many outlets for demonstrating her ability to break down highly complex systems into information that’s easily understood.

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